This is a short and shallow rant about the middleaged men in the gym where I go to.
First, Dude Who's Always Naked. Sir, please put some clothes on. Please don't walk around the locker room swinging your tiny dick, standing in front of the electric fan to dry your pubes off. It's gross. Yes, we're all men. But seeing a limp dick on someone on the downhill of life is disheartening, and stirs up fears inside our heads. You are not an attractive man. And, please don't try to chat me up, or chat my friends up, or chat just about any random strangers up, trying to find some common interest with guys you barely knew. This is the gym's locker room, not a dating lounge where you can approach your type and try to get them to give you their numbers.
Second, the Whole Lot of You Who Wear Brightly Colored Printed Underwear. I believe that men over the age of 30 should not wear loud, attention seeking underwear from Bench in the locker room. I am barely out of my 20's, and I already respect myself enough to stick to basic whites and blacks. You are going to the gym, you are not walking the ramp in a fashion show. It's sad how you want to call attention to your crotch in a room full of other men. And you're not even physically fit.
My problem is that you guys represent a Future Possibility that's scary for any man in his twenties: That someday, I might be one of those sad, desperate middleaged guys who'll compromise decency for attention.
Please grow up, and get dressed.
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